Friday, January 30, 2009

Like a Benetton Ad...

So, sometimes you have to push the envelope. Like nestling yourself tight between two thin brown strips of serenity. Pardon me BOY, mind if I "drop in"?

Some people were really shocked at this photo at the time of its taking. They got SRSLY weirded out saying "that's wrong on so many levels" or "you guys are FGGTs" or even saying "that's SRSLY the gayest thing ever."
I mean for fuck's sake I'm not sucking him off, he's not picking the little white cotton balls off of my underwear, so what's the problem? My shoes are on and so are his Boxers.

Oh, but if we were wearing Speedos and dry humping behind a fence in the missionary position with his legs wrapped around me (*cough* UFC *cough*) everything would automatically be okay & macho.
Throngs of tribal tattooed, testosterone seeping men getting so heated that their Oxytocin levels reach new highs of euphoria to the zenith of a tabooed pleasurable nirvana.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Racial Appetite for Dark Chocolate

So, here is a picture of that Darky & I that I keep talking about that is supporting me in my economical down times. Do you see how grateful he is to have me? Do you see how grateful I am to let him kiss the top of my head, Do you see how we ARE racism, Do you see how we ARE reality, Do you see how we PROVE that being open, free & fun should not be confused with having your own disease, having an extra calf muscle or being superior at all sports. (winter sports do not apply because black peoples hates winter).
We both just want things to go back to the way they were, there's too much to live up to now. It's sooooo stressful. Have we not grown as a people, as a nation, a "land of the free" where we can still have our food cooked for us and our lawns mowed for us without any negative connotations of color. You do the chores and I'll put a roof over your head. Oh, but I see the difference... unless you are not biologically, religiously or sexually bound, it is a bad thing, a frowned upon act, dare I say it? SLAVERY!!!
It's so confusing being white. I can't Imagine what it must be like over at Get Pumped

Wheels of Fire

So, here i do a not-so-barney trick. this one is actually kind of legit. As you may or may not know, Natas did this trick in 1988 out of a driveway and off of a fire hydrant into the street. I do it at Wilson Skatepark in beautiful Chicago, IL on the lakefront. Street Style is my thing, i may not be as good at it as i was back in 1992, but i can still get coping taps from Barneys & yeahs from Flatbellys. Keep your Metal up & your Rubber down. As of the time of this post ending I am currently listening to "Plurnstyle" by Ozric Tentacles from the album "Become the Other" 1995.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Steve Caballero - Ban This...

So, in the spirit of the last post, I give you Cab's part from the video Ban This.
The guy makes love to this mini-ramp.
Oh, and how fitting, right now as I'm typing some music from another Powell-Peralta® video, Animal Chin, comes on iTunes... the track, "Chin Ramp IV" - okay it's over now. It was only a minute long.
Yes, I just gave away my typing speed right there. 30 WPM, not bad. I haven't progressed since 5th grade.
I idolized this guy growing up, one wall in my room was all Cabbed out. Well, actually a corner, due to a picture he had of a Nose-Bone over a hip, taken with a fish-eye, that looked soooooo good when placed into a corner.
Megadeth/Metallica on the South wall, Cab in the southwest corner & Various metal & skating on the West wall. (mostly H-Street riders, Natas, and Gonz).

As of the end of this post I am currently listening to "Skate for the Devil" by The Bonless Ones from the album "Skate for the Devil" 1986.

The "Ban This"

So, quite some time ago there was a Skateboard company called Powell/Peralta, they had some sort of killer street skating team (until H-Street emerged), they put out this video called "Ban This" in 1989. The Trick I'm about to do stems from that video and era. It doesn't really have a name except, well, "the ban this trick". Because no one has see this trick before or after in any other video since that video came out 20 years ago.

Now, as I've said before in previous posts, any time you pop your board up into your hand and jump back on, the Barneys go ape shit and the Flatbellies look at you with such disdain. This trick has been part of every one of my sessions since 1989, so I have it down like Nicole after OJ. Again, High-5's & Pounds abounds my friend. Barneys will take you on any road trip as their street-cred guy, to show the flatbellie that old guys can still skate street better than them and to show other barneys that they don't have to hang up their street style for a 17" wheel base. As of the ending of this post, I am currently listening to "the 5th dimension (live in Paris)" by X-Dream from the album "trip to Trancesylvania" 1996.

The Bank Spot, R.I.P.

So, I found this bank spot by a loading dock in the summer of 2006. Total Barney spot, it's small with nothing to offer a flatbelly. It has an un-waxed parking block at the top. A must for any barney bank Session. You see, a barney will always sit there, sometimes literally, and tell you that they hate wax and that they would much rather Grind raw 'crete and hear the sound of it's destruction beneath their 9" Anti-Hero and Indy 169's with 61mm, 92a "Park Bombers". Product name dropping is a must within the Barney Commune. (as is video part dropping, commonly known as VPD).

Anyway, this trick is not all that cool again, but anytime you pop your board in your hand, do something with it and jump back on is sure to embed your status in the friendly confines of the Barneyhood, and if you take it to fakie, forget about it, you're in like flynn. You know, that old guy who played Robin Hood? Errol Flynn? Total Womanizer? Hard drinker? Nothing? Hello? Ask your Grandmother, he prolly fucked her. As of the time of this post ending, I am currently listening to "over the hills and far away" by Led "fucking" Zeppelin from the album "four blocks in the snow (disc 1)" 1975.


So, all we have here is Me doing an ollie out of a bank onto a piece of plywood from about August 2006. Again, not cool by flatbelly standards, but to a barney, so rad! You see, for a barney, the ollie is hard to come by in the latter years of skating. So for them to see a fellow Barney who can still actually ollie a significant height stokes the vicarious skate flame within. Although this kind of thing does not warrant a coping tap, you still get Yeahed & maybe even a High-5 or a Pound. This post took 5 minutes and 7 seconds, the whole course of the song "way of agony" by Bywar from the album Twelve Devil's Graveyard.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009


So, to be a Barney you have to have some barney tricks under your belt, which is usually under your beer belly, or up your sleeve. Here I do a 540* twirl with a 360* hat spin the opposite way, from around August 2006. This type of shit gets the other Barneys so stoked during a session usually resulting in coping taps with the tail of the their boards.
I am kinda slacking, though, on my quiver of shred sleds & liquor store runners. My quiver is in the form of old skate shoes that are still wearable, just un-skateable. You know, like if you just wanna go to the Bar and chill with your Barney beer of choice, which is, depending on locale, PBR, Old Style, Schlitz (with a kiss of hops) or Newcaslte (to make you look Hip, but not too hip, just in the know & not too fancy).
One other key to being a Barney is that you must always know beforehand where the nearest bar is for after the Session so you can tell fisherman tales of your journeys. Bar? Barney? see the correlation?

Me Being Me

So, here we have not a trick tip, but rather just a trick, if you wanna call it that. It is called the Prefab Tail to Backward from summer 2006. Named by Such Luck Tim. Make do with what you are given, have fun at all times, do dumb shit to make yourself laugh. I didn't get to Barney status for no reason. Show the flatbellies that skateboarding doesn't have to be like Jamie Thompson, Ed Templeman or Bob Burnhurst.

Trick Tip 2: Flipgun

So, here we have the 2nd in the trick tip series, the always favorite No-Comply-Finger-Flip-Staple-Gun. I think this was from summer 2007. I'm pretty sure it was. You can never tell because i've been wearing the same clothes for 10 years, that "reliable roofing shirt is from 1996 and the hat is from 2004. Enjoy Barneydom. Oh yeah, the hat says sk8r4life. I got it airbrushed at Six Flag's Great America. The pin says "pussy is low carb".

Trick Tip 1: Invisible Frontboard/Frontnose

So, Here we have the 1st in the series of trick tips that I have done with the help of Such Luck Tim. After this post I realized that I either have to cut the hair or always skate with a hat on. I cut it, so now it doesn't matter. Enjoy the fun.

Trick Tip: Stapleflipgun

So, I think that putting all my trick tips from my series up on here would be a better idea. After the 8th in the series we just kinda stopped counting and just posting. Not only freeing up space on my Myspace page, but now you could come here and just type in Skateboarding or Trick Tips in the search box and they will all show up. Kind of a one stop shop for all you kids wanting to learn "All my tricks in the house of Barney".

Spencer Stapleflipgun TrickTip - SuchLuck from Such Luck on Vimeo.

Sunday, January 25, 2009


So, I went to Krush today and didn't get A.I.D.S. from skating the bowl, just skated the street course. It's sooo slippery because they never sweep.
I saw some shit go down today, Shirtless Mark did a mighty fine huge Melon grab over the hip in the Mini bowl, some yellow shirt guy from Michigan back 5-0'd up the escalator and around the corner, Jay O & Grumpy feeble fakied the vert wall, Nate Ling aired the vert wall Back & Frontside about a foot over the lip then tried going lein, didn't get over the lip on that, but was right at the coping, it was insane today. I re-laerned wallride nollie outs after not doing one for 10 yaers, and a Frontboard to fakie thingy on some curved rail to slant ramp contraption thingy.
From 9-Noon I never stopped, well once to drink more coffee to get my heart over-pumping. Soma always makes me feel good when I land something, he was getting some damn good pop shove-its today, so I'm a witness if you don't believe him when he tells you about it. Some girl about 10 years old was doing proper 180 ollies of a 4 foot drop, better than the boiz.
This video, right under here is of krush, but not of today's session. just to give you a visual the the places described herein.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Sk8n 'n the Wintre.

So, like living in Chicago is great and all, but this winter has been the most brutal that i can remember in the 9 year of actually living in the city. I come from a "burb" 36 miles west of the city, some of you might say that "that's too far to be a 'burb bro", but when i moved there in '85 our area code was 312 and that's where the commuter train's last stop was.
Back to the point of this blog, are there any points ever? The temp has been so steady of singles and negatives that when it gets to 36* you feel like wearing a wind break or a T-shirt (buster bear preferably). Like Thursday, I got my car washed during 36* weather, felt nice. Friday was a little colder, but then drops 30* in four hours. Being a skateboarder anything indoor is a blessing during the winter, regardless of heat or not, as long as it's enclosed. We have a small warehouse, by we I mean some friends of mine, that gets pretty fucking cold. But... if you get four dudes in there having a full-on session it is pretty bearable. mini-ramp, small street course with a Quarter Pike and a bank ramp with a parking block on top and a gay flat bar that fags pull out during a session of like 20 dudes. so lame. With the right people there it is a blast. not much, but it's "free" and the closest alternative. It sure beats Fingerboarding.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Old Wheels as a Stand

So like, i lifted the K5000S by 1.75" by using some old Skate Wheels as pictured above. I then put a cleaned used 3oz. cat food can upside down around the wheel, it fit better than OJ's glove, how fitting, hahahhahah puns galore. Now my qwerty can fit underneath my synth when not in use, as well as my mouse & pad. I guess i could store my reference manuals under there now, under where? Hahaha you just said Underwear!!! my giddy gat is sleeping on the quilted fur pad, in front of the radiator, i got for her. Bored as Fuck.

White Meat Feast

So, it's like the 20th of January, 2009. I'm trying to find something beside coverage of the Inigge... i mean Inaugeration. Last i heard is that the announcer didn't say Barrik Obumma's middle name. Fucking white people, all PC & shit, not wanting to offend and/or send the wrong message or whatever other gay bullshit they talk all soft while doing. Hopefully it's take a Black (or half black, but no less of a) Man to get me a job. How am i supposed to Own the head of Get Pumped

if i don't have a job? As of now, from me being laid-off, he's the one owning me, I drive him around & he buys me lunch. We both feel weird about the whole thing. I these tuff tymes what can you do but try to make do with what you got. I'm grateful to a have a grateful black to look out for me for all the years i looked after him. Soon Alex... soon. Stay Black, Stay Oppressed. I'll be back on my feet again too convert you back to christianity.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

So, I put away the JD-800 for another day when my studio is back up & running and my workspace isn't 4' x 4'.

I put up my Kawai K5000S instead, it's not as deep as the 16" JD-800, it's only 12" deep. giving me 4" to put my qwerty on the front edge of the table in front of the Synth. A link below is to a blog about synthesizers, all the ones here are about the K5000S.

I really love this synth, you can get such warm ethereal pads, eery ambient noise & the MOST sqealchy bone-cutting-ear-scraping-tinnitus-inducing acid lines. Not that it compares to a 303, it's just more intense, to me anyway. When i played with Cruciform Injection this was my synth that i played at every show from 1998-2003 on songs like "lost queen", "embryonic testaments" & "black tides".

It's not filled with a ton of factory presets, allowing you to come up with ideas of your own to be more original. Even if you're not into music you should still goto Guitar Center or Sam Ash and sit in the Synth section for one hour and just play with one that catches your eye, you'd be surprised, maybe even get the bug like i did in 1990 after playing with one while there to get my first guitar. i first got the bug in 1988 when i went to a guys house who we skated with, he was five years older and not home, his dad invited us in and sat us down in the dark with nothing on except a UV lamp for his window plants. he had this massive 88 key synth just playing the spookiest ambient i have heard,. Well, i haven't heard that music up until then, and in my head , from what i remember, it was the coolest.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

It Is Being The Gay

So here is the Jim & Tammy link

I tried inserting a link and it just showed up as a blank space, if you have any pointers on how to add links properly i will buy you a smoothie in the future. I'm new at this.

Jim & Tammy Faye

I found this on the intertron today, hope you have a good laugh.

Prolly see more of you guys after i get the go ahead from the dentist this Thursday the 15th to resume normal skate activity.

Praise the Jesus, speaking of which, i was behind a truck with a license plate that said "Jesus Jr".

Da Binnis Man

So, i was visiting my Mom's's house last week after Dental Pwnage and realized that i could prolly start an Ebay store or just sell a ton of shit on there. Yeah i know i could prolly just sell it on craigslist, but let's face it i'm out of a job and would like to get the most $$$ for my crap as possible. I have old G.I. Joe figures & vehicles, old Star Wars figures, some still new in official Kenner mail order bags with Kenner written on the bag, old clothed from the 90's that i think some Kewl Hipsturd would love to look as vintage and ironic as possible. Does anyone remember that clothing Brand Limpies? well, i have a pair of flannel Limpies. pants & shorts that are 38", a vintage Cross-Colors pull-over, old skate stuff like a pair of Stage V Independent trucks, a shit load of Gullwings with the nylon baseplate, a pair of Tracker Six-Track w/aluminum baseplate & copers. Old ass wheels, like a pair of Powell (not peralta) roller skate wheels "roller bones". I just need a Digi Chiodo Cam like the one the Dry Bones Nation has to take pics of all these things, then just someone to walk me through setting up an Ebay seller Account. i tried it 7 years ago and gave up. Also, i wanna sell Psychedelic trance CD's from home again over the internet, find a girlfriend, have a kid and be a stay at home dad. Ima be go wear my Buster Bear shirt that i gots from Turbo, mine say Lonely Boy. It's like sooooo true. TTYL, stay Kewl & stay Chiodo.

Monday, January 12, 2009


so i just done sent out three resumes, god this looking for work shit blows. of course no one is hiring, the economy is for shit. but i have to make it look like i'm trying so i don't have people on my case if i say i didn't look for work for one day, or send out at least one resume a day. let me deal with it. so tommy boy is on now, that's kind of funny, if you wanna stick your head up a butcher's ass to get a good look at a great steak.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

I done be go do get bored

So, being dentally PWND totally SUXD, I can't go skate until I go have my check up on the 14th, while all the bros are Shredding I get to watch The Universe on History & listen to My itch to skate is killing me, I'm getting all figety trying not to pull out the fingerboard and skate my Compu-tor Moni-tor. Well, at least when i go to get cat fuud i will be occupied. Now, what to wear to this party tonight?

Friday, January 9, 2009

Black Presidents for White Teeth

Okay so after a slight hiatus, i figured i better write something. well if you did not know, ten years ago, February '99, some drunk Wiggers knocked two teeth out, at the Des Plaines Oasis around midnight, all because we did not want to fight them and were not intimidated, which only in turn made them more mad. he punches my friend in the side of the head, not head on. i go in to push them apart guy ducks, i go forward, and the other Wigger either kneed me or had a fist of quarters. i look into my hand, i see two teeth and a pool of blood. it happened so fast i barely remember the impact. so we just speed off down 90 exiting at Barrington road, find an emergency room, they clean me up, throw my teeth in a cup of Milk, i was there until about 7 or 8 in the morning, they cleaned my teeth, pumped me full of three different types of pain via injection, one in my mouth, not enough, then one in between my fingers, still not enough, finally they had me expose a butt cheek, that did the trick. So, half knocked out i lay back and they shove my teeth back in their sockets. I was then referred to an oral surgeon in Bartlett, IL., put some sort of plaster on the teeth then attached a wire to two teeth on either side of the recently placed two. it looked kinda make shift but i was not complaining, a few Vicodins and antibiotics, i was good to eat just as long as i kept it in back.
FORWARD to November 2008: while flossing in between "the two teeth" at thanksgiving i couldn't feel the front one. Shit, i never told you which two, if you Google a tooth number chart, they were teeth 7 & 8. I knew it was only a matter of time until I was fucked again, So I had to start eating everything out of the left side of my mouth avoiding the front, cutting all food into squares. So, January 4th i was at a holiday party being careful eating a tiny pretzel stick, a small nub of pretzel got between my tongue & tooth and tapped it sending a shock through my socket like testing a new 9 volt battery. Cold sweat and dizziness followed, just dangling there held on by only the gum tissue, not flapping in the wind. i went into the Dentist on the 5th at 7:30 in the morning and took an X-ray, they sent me to an oral surgeon by 8a.m. I sat there from 8:30 to 10:45 felling helpless in a chair just saying fuck to myself. By Noon they had extracted the two teeth and gave me a bone graft due to the bone around the teeth resorbing, so they packed new donated ground bone into the holes and sewed my gums shut. I now have a cool retainer with two new 7 & 8's as temps until it's time to go back and get my Titanium implants installed in about 3-5 months. So maybe April or June I will be able to talk normal again. thanks for reading, the three of that you that do.


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