So, when you drive on the Highway there are soem things you might want to consider since you do not drive them all the time and other people drive on them for a living. Me, I have been driving on them since 1990.
Most of that time was spent driving on the highways to New York, Ohio, Wisconsin, Iowa, Indiana, and of course all over Illinois Tollway system.
Along the way I learned way more than what they teach you in that pathetic Drivers Ed class. This is a Stop sign, that's the brake pedal, here's your license.
Some of these rules have long since back into the back seat. DO NOT sit in the left hand lane, Slower Traffic should Always keep Right. Even if you're doing 70 and a car comes up behind you, move over for them to pass.
You might see them give you another Rule of Thumb called "Flash to Pass." This doesn't mean that the person behind you has Road Rage it just means...
"excuse me, I am in the car behind you and since I am going faster than you, I was wondering if I may pass you and get to the gas pump at the next oasis for, not only do I need gas, I also have to go to the bathroom severely."
This means that if you are just sitting in the left lane listening to Jeff Buckley and soem vehicle is fast approaching from the rear and flashes lights at you they're not being dicks, YOU ARE.
Kindly put on your Right signal and move into the Right lane and turn off your Signal and wave as they go by. This will not only make their day, but also make you feel better as a person being the good samaritan making the roads friendlier in the process.
The Tractor/Trailer, Rig or Semi as it is widely known is pretty much the life blood of your lifestyle, be it that
Hummer
or
BMW you drive,
Doritos
&
Snapple you drink or the
Nikes &
Ed Hardy clothes you wear, they all get to their destinations and on to your body by way of the roads after they pick it up from the Docks after being made in Taiwan.
The people who drive these things are widely seen as pieces-of-shit-slack-jawed-hicks. They not only give you your vanity, but you spit on them while they try fulfill it.
If you are behind a Semi and he puts on his signal to get over DO NOT speed up to get in front of him. Instead flash your lights to let him know that it is clear for him to get over and pass the Mini-van that is slowing him down while he tries to deliver your
Doritos to 7-11. When he gets over just sit back and listen to that new
Kirk Hammet solo on the new
Metallica album.
Now, when he gets in front of you he will let you know he is thankful by flipping his tralier lights off and on, or vice versa if in the daylight. Then as you both pass that slow Mini-van you can both flip it off.
Likewise, if you ever happen to be that slow Mini-van, due to your Mom holding the
OS handle with white knuckles and telling you to
drive 55
, and the Semi is to approach you from behind in the Right lane, as he passes you and is ready to get over, when he puts on his right turn signal to warn you that he is now going to be in front of you, then you should kindly flash your lights to let him know that his trailer is clear of your car and he may now get over and you can
Eat his Dust (Mud Flap slogan), he will then say Thank You by flashing his trailer lights. You will gain respect on the road from other truckers. You see, they have
CB
and talk to each other. If you're a Speeding Ass they will let others ahead know you are coming or if you are the slow car and do your part to let them know trailer clearance and passage they will most likely let others behind know about your kind ways despite your lack of speed.
If all else fails, Wave: If a car needs to get in for a
Rush Hour merge and nobody is moving or going anywhere fast... let them in. If you need to get in, make eye contact and wave sincerely. It's the morning, everybody is pissed-off. Put a smile on a face then go back to listening to that droning & draining NPR.
If you are just Cruising along and there are only maybe 9 cars per mile you should still use the
Slower Traffic Keep Right rule, which is
clearly posted as a sign on the highway, Police that see you driving in the left lane will most likely automatically think that you are speeding, if you stay in the right lane until you need to pass the vehicle in front of you, the Police person will think you are just doing 5 mph over. Look
here.
Merging: If you are in the right lane hauling-ass or just cruising 5 mph over and you see the merge sign for an On Ramp, put on your signal, make sure you are clear, and proceed into the left lane. This is especially kind if the merge is a Semi. Traffic will only run smoother if you follow these tips. If you are the Merging Car, as you advance to the highway you should gauge how fast the traffic going on the highway and match that. DO NOT just get on the highway at 55 or better yet 45. Do Not brake if you have traffic following you on the ramp, you will Piss them Off. Simply get behind a car at the same speed, if you do try to be a hero and get in front of a car, please make sure you are matching that speed.
You're a Danger to yourself and those around you. If traffic is doing 63 mph you should get up to 65 mph and merge.
Think of merging traffic as a
Zipper, when you zip your coat you don't slow down and try to 3 teeth in between 1 tooth, they all go together at the same speed. Think about it.
ALSO DO NOT JUST SIT NEXT TO ANOTHER VEHICLE AT THE SAME SPEED.
No Pacing allowed on the road. (unless you are the state trooper) Let others by. You are the cause of
Road Rage, people don't get in their cars looking to shoot somebody or force them off the road in a ball of flames.
Remember to always turn your lights on during Rainy Days, Grey Days and at Night. Somebody loves you and would like to seen you for dinner later.
Good Bye and 2 friendly beeps. Hope to see you on the road someday, flash you and wave back.
As of the end of this post I am currently listening to "
Dancing With Myself
" by
Billy Idol, live @
Poplar Creek Music Theatre in Hoffman Estates, IL. back in 1984.
